So, there’s this battered wife. Every day, she comes home to the same abusive husband. After all, she married him. “Until death do us part,” she said. “For better or worse,” she said. It’s certainly worse. Every night, he gets drunk and beats the shit out of her. I know. This isn’t as funny as most of my articles, but bear with me. I’m going to make up for it by invoking other emotions that you would only expect from me if you’ve read my dramatic work.
There are times when he treats her amazingly well. He buys her nice things, and gives her a lot of things that she feels like she doesn’t deserve. After some time, she may start to feel like she does, but deep down, she knows better. He says he loves her. He may even sound sincere. Then, when the doors shut, he drinks. He drinks and drinks and drinks. She does a little thing that he doesn’t like and he goes way overboard. He beats the shit out of her and projects to her. “I love you so much!” he screams, “Why do you make me do this to you?” She accepts that he only does it out of love and it’s her fault. She screams back, “I don’t know!”
When he’s not around, she might complain, or she might just harbour bottled resentment and pretend everything is okay. She may run out one night, or call the police, but she always comes back. Why? Who knows? There are many proposed reasons and I doubt any one of them is completely true. But, it all boils down to complacency. She has become complacent in her situation. She has accepted that she will always be with him, like it or not. She has the power to change it, but she likely won’t.
But, what if she does? What if she tries to leave him? Of course, he’s going to stand in the doorway and do everything in his power to keep her here and in submission. He might kill her, but death might be a relief from this life. She might escape his clutches and even prevent him from battering another. So, why not give it a shot? Who knows? It all boils down to complacency. The exact reason for this complacency can only be speculated and is never truly understood.
But, this story has been a metaphor. Sure, this happens literally far too often, but a bigger damage is the metaphor. You are the battered wife. Your government is the abusive husband. Girl, you’re better than this. You don’t deserve what he’s doing to you. Get out of there before he kills you.
You know I’m right. You know it. But you tell yourself he loves you. He buys you nice things. Depending on your government, he might buy you roads, food, healthcare, or any number of things. But, he buys it with the money he took when he mugged you. From the money he got from the swear jar that you only put in there because of the threat of violence. You know this, but you tell yourself that he’s only doing what’s best for you. That you make him do this to you. Girl, you’re better than this. You need to leave the creep before he kills you.
You don’t know where else to go. All other men you know are even worse wife-beaters. You don’t want that. Besides, you don’t have the money to make it without him. Girl, you don’t need a man. Don’t stay with him because you need him. If the right man comes along, you’ll know it, and you’ll get with him. But, don’t settle for a man who treats you like this. You’re better than this.
I keep pleading with you because I want you to be happy. But, in the end, I know you’ll stay with the creep. Battered wives always do. But, it breaks my heart. It breaks my heart to see you just accept this.